question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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