Where is the hickey?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
