You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize