We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
