Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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