my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
