Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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