Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
