I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
