does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
