I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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