The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
