I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
