And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
