I'm drive I can fine osifer
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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