hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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