this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
