STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
