Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Can I color on your dick again?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
did you just send me my own nude
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
