I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
