I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
