It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I checked into jail on foursquare
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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