Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
it hurts more in the daytime
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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