I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize