I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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