idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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