Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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