So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
