what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
