Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
