All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize