Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Randomize