Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
