No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
