just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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