If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
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