how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
