i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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