im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
