i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
