porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
