get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
