Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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