Porn is love you can see.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
