she was so not down for the gang bang
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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