i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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