He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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