It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
