I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
