remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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