so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize