Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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