loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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